Getting married to a Punjabi? If you are not a Punjabi yourself, then get ready for a boatload of surprises. You will spend the rest of your life with, arguably, the happiest people on earth but with a few side effects. Just don’t bother to change them, because nothing done in the past has worked. Enjoy the ride and get used to these 16 things:
1. Everyone, almost everyone around you will talk loudly; get used to it.
Even if you are standing just inches away from people at home, they will still shout out to you, as if you were standing a few blocks away from them.
2. Almost every day, there is going to be some sort of drama.
The smallest things will trigger emotional outbursts. It may involve — you have been warned — crying and cursing, too.
Just hold your ground, count till 100 if you are scared or bored and let it pass. Punjabis get back to their good-natured selves very soon.
3. Don’t forget to use the standard prefix “Ji” else you will be insulting everyone if you don’t do that.
No matter what you call your mom and dad, when married into a Punjabi family, mummy becomes ‘mummy ji’, Daddy become ‘daddy Ji’, your sister-in-law becomes ‘parjhai ji’ , and so on.
4. A Punjabi family is not big, it’s huge, and you’ve got to keep it like that.
Relatives are going to be there in every part of the country, and the world. You will have to please them, whether they come from Bhatinda, Ludhiana, Chandigarh or Canada.
5. Kanneda and Amreeka are scared places. Anyone who stays there is an important NRI relative.
They are addressed as Kanneda wali bua ji, Kanneda wale Chacha Ji, Kanneda wale Phofa ji, and you must give them special attention, care and time.
6. Breakfast means Paranthas. And if the temperature outside is soaring, there’s Lassi too.
Once married into a Punjabi family, forget about dieting. Firstly, they don’t like thin and lean people, and, secondly, they won’t let you go on a diet come what may. Don’t worry about variety. There’s aloo, gobhi, muli, daal, even egg ka parantha, which will always be served with a large dollop of butter and a glass of Lassi.